A no-nonsense, step-by-step guide to troubleshooting conflict from couples counsellor Kim Polinder – the relationship coach who has amassed millions of views online for her accessible, actionable advice.
Arguments are inevitable, but they don’t have to be destructive.

Inspired by her years as a tech engineer, Kim Polinder provides a systemic, root-cause approach to understanding triggers, navigating emotions and turning recurring fights into moments of connection.

You’ll discover:
· How to take an empathy-first approach: slow down, check in and lay the emotional groundwork for successful solutions
· How to recognise your triggers: it’s never really about the dishes. Unravel the core beliefs and attachment styles underlying the fights
· How to troubleshoot arguments in real time: regulate your emotions, communicate effectively and reframe old patterns
· A simple, effective flowchart for conflict resolution: an easy-to-follow system for breaking complex emotional ruptures into clear, doable steps for repair

A game-changing approach for her clients and hundreds of thousands of followers, Kim Polinder teaches you to navigate conflict through accessible case studies, practical exercises and guided questions.

Don’t remain stuck in endless argument loops with your partner. With clarity and insight, Why We Fight shows you how to disrupt the pattern, resolve the issue and move forward with empathy, love and understanding.